ANME
by FourThieves
Summary: An Anime parody of Kickassia. In this Who Framed Roger Rabbit-esque world, Shinji is tired of being the butt monkey of the Toons from Japan. His idea? Invade the Acme warehouse that leads to Toontown. Will he and the others be victorious? As can be plainly seen, there are alot of characters and most of them are on the poster for this story. Obviously I don't own the characters.
1. The Withering Eyes

_Oculus Arescente_

The Acme warhouse, it is a simple one at that. Located in the middle of California, it prides itself on the proud tradition of storing many hilarious treasures, but most importantly it also contains behind it the home of Toons called Toontown. The factory is ran by the grandson of Marvin Acme named Charles Acme who is taller than two of the Three Stooges, but shorter than one of them. For years the factory has been peaceful and sound, with no conflict actual conflict. That is where Shinji Ikari comes in...

In a dark room inside of the Acme factory, Charles in a white business suit and sun-glasses takes out a cigar and lights it up. He sits back on his chair just relaxing as he putes his arm under his head to rest on. Before he can fully relax though, his secretary bursts through the door. "Sir we have someone who said he wants to talk to you," he said, "Should we send him away?"

Charles sits back up and shakes his head. He gesteres him to let the visitor speak with him and it turns out to be a fourteen year old kid wearing casual clothes with brown hair. "Hello Charles Acme," he says, "My name is Shinji Ikari. Famous lead actor of Neon Genesis Evangelion and all around spectacular guy."

Charles doesn't respond to Shinji yet and gestures him to continue. "I'm fine and all," Shinji says, "Um, I come from a special group of Toons called Anime. We were created in Japan and like the Toons in Hollywood, we too act in shows and movies overseas. I don't want to brag, but we're pretty succesful."

Charles keeps staring at him waiting to see if he's done. Shinji feels a little stress from this, but continues talking anyways. "I can see that you inherited your grandfathers property," he says, "You must be very proud. However if I might be a little critical, well this warehouse is not really big and you're not very big."

Charles still listens to Shinji talk with no change of expression. "So in otherwords, I am going to invade your warehouse," he says, "My group is going to come to California, enter your warehouse, and take it over as our own. Now don't try to resist or fight back, my group is large and indestructible, while you are just well, one guy. So I'll give you a chance to make it easy by just letting me have the Will to Toontown and we will not invade your work place, deal?"

Charles doesn't say a word as he lightly pushes Shinji out of his room with the secretary grabbing his shrit to escort him out of the warehouse. Shinji backs away from the secretary and walks out of the place by himself. "Why do people always want to do this the hard way?"

Afew hours later, Shinji is seen sitting before a laptop in an apartment. He opens up the website to the Acme warehouse as he scrolls down the page. '_Acme Warehouse. The gate to Toontown and my ultimate achievement._' He then picks up a phone besides him on a table and calls Stocking Anarchy.

Stocking at her home picks up her phone and answers it. "Hello," she says,

Shinji smiles and says "It's time." He then hangs up and calls many others saying the same phrase to L, Conan Edogawa, Kamina, and many others before hanging up on one last member he could find. Shinji confidently puts his phone away, but then it rings and he answers it. "Hello" he says.

"I'm sorry to disrupt you on short notice," L says, "But what do you mean when you said it's time? I mean you just told me 'it's time' like I'm supposed to know what that means."

Shinji is shock by this. "Get on the band-wagon L" he says, "It's the takeover of the Acme warehouse, oh wait just a minute I got another call." He hangs up and takes the second call, which is from Stocking.

"Um yeah what do you mean by it's time?" she says.

"You don't know?," Shinji says.

"Yeah, I'm a little stuck on that," Stocking says.

"It doesn't matter right now," Shinji says, "Just meet me at- oh wait a minute I got another call."

He then takes the other call which is from Kamina. "Well Shinji I think it's 2:22 PM," Kamina says.

Shinji is a little confuse by this. "I thought you were wondering what time it was." Kamina says.

"No I'm telling you it is time!" Shinji says.

"That's right," Kamina says, "And I'm saying that it's 2:22 PM."

"No I mean-" Shinji says, "Wait just a minute, I got another call."

Then he takes the **other **call from Vash the Stampede. "I am right behind you 110% Shinji," he says, "Any Chick-Felae refusing to serve us on Sundays, will be blown sky high!" He then laughs manaically.

"Wait what are you talking about," Shinji says.

"Well what are you talking about," Vash says.

"The invasion of the Acme warehouse." Shinji says.

"What's an Acme?" Vash says, "Is that something you get on your face?"

"I- Hold on, I'll get back to you." Shinji says. He then takes a call from Conan.

"Alright my clock says 2:24," Conan says, "But I think Kamina has a more accurate time."

"Hold on just a moment." Shinji says. He hangs up, but it is still on Conans line.

"It's still me Shinji." he says.

"Sorry about that." Shinji says. He then calls back Stocking.

"Um, hi I'm still confused here." she says.

"Look it's hard to explain," Shinji says, "Just meet me at the Acme warehouse in California."

"Okay, I'll just walk over to California." Stocking says.

"I'll fly you there." Shinji says.

"When will you?" Stocking says.

"I don't know," Shinji says, "I can barely keep track of who I'm talking to. Oh that reminds me, I need to call Rei for a moment." He hangs up, but then gets a call from Kamina again.

"Now it's 2:23 PM." he says.

"Go away," Shinji says, he hangs up and calls Guts. "Hey Guts, are you there?"

"I don't know how I have a phone," Guts says, "But what do you want?"

"Any reason you have Rei's number?" Shinji says.

"Why don't you know her number in the first place?" Guts says.

"Just give me the number already." Shinji says.

Afew seconds later he calls Rei, but then he encounter her answering machine. In the background a theme is playing with Rei singing in a monotone over it. "Believe it or not, I am not at home," Rei's answering machine says, "Leave a message at the beep."

"Damn it," Shinji says, he then hangs up, "Let's see if the other Rei could help out." So he enters the numbers and calls Rei Hino.

"Hello," she says, "Hino's residence speaking."

"Rei, it's time." Shinji says.

"It is?" Rei says.

"Yes, we are taking over the Acme warehouse!" Shinji says.

"We're taking over the Acme warehouse?" Rei says.

"I know right," Shinji says, "So get your stuff together and head over to-"

"Oh by the way, this has been an answering machine the whole time," she says, "Leave your message after the beep." Afterwords it beeps.

He sits there with a confuse look on his face for afew seconds before calling up Hatsune Miku. "Hatsune, I need your help," Shinji says, "We are going to take over the Acme warehouse."

"Oh sorry Shinji I'm a little busy," she says, "I got to promote some things so I will not have enough time and my manager is getting kind of rude."

"Oh come on it's just a little skin." the manager says.

"Hold on, another call." Shinji says, he hangs up and then calls Kamina again.

"2:24 PM" he says.

"Alright, I'm putting everybody on speaker," Shinji says, "Can you all hear me now?"

Everyone responds yes after he put the speaker on.

"Look, we are taking over the Acme warehouse," Shinji says, "I'm flying you all out to California so we can prepare for the invasion."

"And where are we all going to stay?" Vash says.

"It's okay," Shinji says, "I booked a hotel for everyone."

A day or two later, the group stays in one hotel room, crammed together. "Well gee, I didn't see that one coming." L says.

The people in the room includes Tamama a frog-like alien, Alphonse Elric a mechanical robot-looking figure and his human brother Edward, Conan Edogawa, Ash Ketchem, Guts, Kamina, Mamoru Chiba, Stocking Anarchy, Homura Akemi, Mashiro Kuno, San, Tetsuo, Krillin, and L. "Oh man I am so excited," he says to Alphonse Elric sitting next to him, "Are you excited? Because I'm excited!"

Alphonse looks annoyed, or as much as he can having a still face. Even Conan looks stress-out by this. "I can't believe he dragged us here to California." Conan says.

"Tell me about it," Ash says, "I could be selling dangerous miniture Pokeballs at Burger King right now."

Guts sitting next to Kamina sees a purple bottle that he's holding. "Hey I think that bottle looks familiar," Guts says, "Doesn't that have that doctor Tomoe guy in there?"

"How did you know Tomoe is in there?" Kamina says.

"Yeah I remeber when he commited that one crime." Guts says.

"you know I don't want to recall that incident," Kamina says, "So I'm just going to forget you just said that."

"No I remember it," Guts says, "He actually-"

Kamina snaps towards him. "No, I mean yeah that happened, but let's just forget about it. That was the past." Kamina then dramatically looks up to the sky as he remembers that incident.

Guts decides to just let it go. Homura Akemi and Mashiro Kuno look at each other. "So who are you supposed to be," Homura says, "Are you like some Power Ranger or something."

Mashiro then looks at her body for a second and then looks at Homura's. "Something doesn't seem right about this," she says "...Did you get a new haircut?"

Outside of the hotel room, Shinji contemplates about somethings. "Okay I got them all under the same roof," he says, "Now to be brave and Tell them my plan." He inhales and exhales heavily for a second. "Okay I musn't run away." He then smiles and walks in through the door. "Alright, is everybody here?"

"It better be," Homura says, "We can't fit anymore people in this room."

Tetsuo then realizes something. "Hey wait a minute," he says, "Where's Edward?"

Krillen looks at what Tetsuo is sitting on. "I think you're sitting on him dude." he says.

Tetsuo looks below to see that Krillen is right. "It's okay," Edward says, "I didn't want to stand anyway."

"Okat everyone, we are going to do the most dangerous thing we have ever done before," Shinji says, "We are going to takeover the Acme warehouse!"

"Why?" San says.

"What?" Shinji says.

"Well why are we invading the Acme warehouse," San says, "Isn't it just a warehouse filled with gag toys and the like?"

"San do you actually think that everyone else is asking-" Shinji says.

He gets interrupted by the others who all at once ask why. "Alright just listen," Shinji says, "Look the fact is that we don't get as much praise as we usually get in the U.S. I mean have you ever wondered what it's like to have your own town?"

"Well actually..." Mamoru says.

"Listen guys," Shinji says, "This is a once in a lifetime oppurtunity. Just behind the walls of the warehouse is Toontown, which we will take over once we get the warehouse."

"The wall is made of steel that no Toon could break through," Conan says, "Even if we get through to Toontown, what will we use to take over it? All we will have is a warehouse of jokes and gag toys. What can we do with a warehouse of toys?"

"What can't we do with a warehouse!?" Shinji says.

Tamama in his dorkiness says "Woah"

"I swear to you guys," Shinji says, "Once we capture Acme, we will grow throughout the states and blossom into the ultimate power house!"

"Oh yeah," Conan says, "If there is anyone that can lead a bunch of people, it's Shinji Ikari, the 'I musn't run away kid.'"

The other members snicker with Shinji clenching his fist angrily. He does however calm down to talk back to Conan. "You know there is another group of people like you Conan," Shinji says, "I think they were called **Nazis! **They were hateful people who just wanted everything their way, are you a Nazi Conan?"

"No" Conan says.

**"Are you a Nazi Conan?" **Shinji says.

"I'm not a Nazi," Conan says.

"Because I don't want any Nazis in my plan!" Shinji says.

**"No I'm not a Nazi," **Conan says, he looks around to see the others looking at him, "I'm not, I'm not a Nazi!"

Shinji calms down a little bit. "Good, because we are not Nazis," he says, "We are Samurai warriors like our ancestors before us."

The others suddenly start listening to him. "You remember the Satsuma Rebellion, everyone thought they were crazy," Shinji says, "But you know what? They've gotten far haven't they, because they were dedicated!"

The others agree as they all give out a "Yeah!"

"That's right everyone," Shinji says, "They were strong!"

Another hooray from the group as Shinji continues his speech. "Some say that they were crazy." he says.

The group were indecisive on that line, but Shinji continues. "Well everyone else thinks that we are crazy," he says, "So in the end that gives us a bigger advantage!"

The group lets out another hooray. "First we will take the Acme warehouse," he says, "Then the company, then Toontown. Until we got enough power to take over California and soon the U.S. then we go global! First we do Mexico, then Germany, then France, and everyone else who stands in our way, and then..."

"The Moon," Mamoru says.

"Before that" Shinji says.

"The world?" Mamoru says.

"The world! And don't let anybody tell you that you can't do it," Shinji says, "So everyone, what are you? A Nazi or Samurai!?"

The group cheers loudly, motivated by his speech. Even Tamama cries out of pride and total respect. In the midst of this, Shinji confronts Stocking. "Now as the future Prime Minister of this world, I need someone to take over afterwords." Shinji says, "You are the only one who can keep this nation alive. I mean you do work under the same company that I do. Interested?"

"Um I don't know Shinji," Stocking says, "I was kind of hoping for being a Prime Minister."

"Well I think I can work you into a cabinet," Shinji says.

"Okay then," Stocking says.

Shinji then faces everybody. "Alright everybody," he says, "Let's go kick some Acme ass!"

All of them run out of the hotel room, cheering and yelling with Edward closing the door behind them.

Back at the Acme warehouse, Charles seems to be discussing with someone over his office table. "Alright Chuckster D. Jonas, a kid named Shinji says that he is a Japanese Toon who wants our warehouse," he says, "He plans on doing that through force. What would be your suggestion?" It turns out however that he is really talking to noone in then goes into the closet, changes into a grayish business suit and a mustache, and then goes to the other side of the table. "I think we should pay attention to any visitor that comes around," he says, "But we shouldn't worry too much about that." He then goes back to the closet to change back into his white business suit and sits back before the table. "Okay"

A couple of steps outside of the factory, Shinji and the others dramatically walks towards it. Most of them seem pretty serious about this matter, except for Tamama who is very excited about it. "Oh man, we're going to beat them aren't we," he says, "We're going to annihilate them?"

"Yes Tamama," Shinji says, "But save your energy. You're going to need it when we get to the pointless torture."

Tamama rubs his hands together in delight. Inside of the office, Charles begins to relax on his chair, but then his secretary barges in. "Sir, a couple of Toons are marching over to the warehouse," he says, "What should we do about it?"

Charles gets off of the chair and walks out of the office without saying a word to the secretary. He finds an object covered by a cloth and pulls it outside. He sees the Anime Toons marching towards him. "Wow, he looks so much smaller than I thought he would be." Edward says.

"That's because you're far away from him idiot." Homura says.

"Well he's going to be alot closer," Shinji says, "Now charge!"

The group then runs towards him, screaming and yelling as Charles just stands there waiting for them to come closer. As the group finally gets close enough to attack him, he pulls the cloth off of the object to reveal it as a cannon. The group runs away as soon as they see the cannon like cowards. Charles smiles as they run away and he just casually walks back inside, dragging the cannon with him.

Afew minutes later, the group is back at the hotel room in very melancholy moods. "Well that turned out well." L says.

"Didn't you have any other startegy than just going up to the warehouse and screaming **ahhh**?" Tetsuo says.

"Well I didn't really think ahead." Shinji says.

Guts face palms at Shinji. "No, you were just thinking like an internet meme," he says, "Step one: Gather group to invade warehouse. Step two: Invade warehouse. Step three: ... Step four: Ruler of the world."

"Well actually it works more like Step one: Gather group. Step two: Invade warehouse. Step three: ... Step four: Ruler of the **Universe.**" Shinji says.

"Well you can't just do that Shinji," Krillin says, "You have to have a plan for Kami's sake. You got to have a strategy!"

"Krillin, you're asking that I develop a plan to invade a warehouse," Shinji says, "Let's analyze that for a second. How the fuck could I know that he had a cannon. It's a small warehouse of gags and toys for gods sake!"

"Well I consider this a failure." San says.

"Yeah I agree," Homura says, "Let's go back to Japan."

The others agree and heads towards the door, but Shinji runs towards it and blocks the exit. "Now wait a minute you guys," he says, "Do you honestly want to back down from our chance to have tjis moment of glory?"

Tamama runs towards Shinji and floats up in the air to Shinji's face. "I would never abandon you Shinji."

Shinji lightly pushes Tamama back to the floor. "I know that Tamama" he says, "Alright, all we need is a plan."

"Mabye we should make an ultimatim." Vash says.

"Nah, we still have to get close to him." Shinji says.

"How about I use Pikachu to cut the power out." Ash says.

"Nah, they'll expect us to do that." Shinji says.

Then suddenly Myotismon appears out of nowhere. "How about I use my bats to take over the warehouse," he says, "They can fit through most small entrees."

"No, that guy practically lives at that warehouse," Shinji says, "And how did you get in here anyways?"

"I just wanted to be noticed." Myotismon says.

"Get out of here!" Shinji says.

Myotismon pitifully leaves the room. "How about we use Alphonse as a battering ram." Edward says.

"Hey" Alphonse says.

"Nah, his head is not hard enough." Shinji says.

"**Hey**" Alphonse says.

"Maybe we could use our Hollow form to attack the warehouse head-on!" Mashiro says.

"That's your answer for everything." Shinji says.

"Well it would work if you gave it a try." Mashiro says.

"Um, hey I know this might be a shot in the dark," L says, "But why don't we just use the weapons we have?"

"Nah that won't work." Shinji says. After two seconds of silence Shinji speaks again. "Wait, I have an idea!"

"Well gee, does it involve using-" L says.

"It involves using weapons," Shinji says, "Vash get your guns, Ash get your Pokemon, Guts get your blade, Edward search for some useful alchemy tricks, San get some of your weapons as well, Tamama, Kamina, you guys might have some heavy duty weapons to spare, and Stocking you get your sword from your... stocking."

"Well what are you going to use to combat Charles?" Stocking says.

"I'm going to use the greatest weapon I'm going to find," Shinji says, "And everyone else find any weapon you can find. By god we're going to need this and this time... there will be no dawn for Acme." Shinji then goes into the closet as the others suit up for battle.

Vash pulls out two pistols from his pocket and swings them around just to show off, Conan tries making a weapon out of a pillow before just settling on a gun, Kamina waits by the window to see his robot Gurren, San pulls out one of her spears and practices its sharpness on a pillow, L hypothesis what weapon he could use before grabbing a fruit from a plate and eating it, Tamama pulls out a ray gun out of nowhere, Ash takes out some minature pokeballs from his bag, Stocking takes off one of her stockings and transforms it into a katana, Edward reads a book on some alchemist techniques while Alphonse sharpens up his body, Homura pulls out a gun from her sleeves, and Tetsuo practices his levitation on a lamp, but it doesn't work out until he focuses more of his energy onto it which causes it to fly over and hit Guts by accident. Guts gives him an angry look before practicing his swing on his sword and finally Mamoru throws one of his roses near the closet door, in which Shinji comes out with the EVA suit still deflated.

"Are you sure about using that robot?" Guts says.

Shinji looks at Guts and smiles before he presses a button on his suit that causes it to fit firmly onto his body.

**To be continued...**


	2. Triumph and Treacle

_Triumphus quod Proditus_

The next morning, Kamina looks out the window as Shinji approaches him. "Is everyone preparing for battle?" Kamina says.

"They are Kamina," Shinji says, "You know Kamina, it would really help if you summon him out of that jar."

"Summon him?" Kamina says.

"It would just be this once," Shinji says, "Just this once then you can put him back."

Kamina turns to face Shinji. "Put him back," he says, "You can't just put him back in there. I don't even know how he got in there in the first place! Everyday it's trying to get out to exact its revenge!"

"All you need is to set him free," Shinji says, "Then we can put him in control-"

"Control!? There is no control!" Kamina says, he grabs the curtain of the windows tightly, "There is only chaos and anarky and the world in pain!"

"If you would only try," Shinji says.

He turns to face Shinji again. "Try!? There is no try!" he says, he then grabs Shinji by his Eva suit "There is only the darkness!"

"Let him out Kamina" Shinji says, "Let him out for me and the team!"

Kamina calms down and lets go of Shinji. "That man is long gone," he says, "You will see him no more."

Shinji walks away for afew steps before turning around. "Sometimes we must fight madness with madness." Afterwords he exits the room.

Later at the Acme warehouse, Charles is walking around, examining the products and workers when suddenly, he hears footsteps. He rushes outside to see a huge purple robot over the horizon, walking towards his warehouse. It however stops to open its hatch and reveal the group ready for battle. Just below the robot is a Ferrari driven by Mamoru and L. Some members of the group jump out onto the robots shoulders which reveals Shinji controlling it. He smiles devilishly at Charles who is understandibly shocked by this and goes back inside. Just aheads up everyone," he says, "We might be attacked by some people. Secretary, call the police or something."

Secretary looks at the robot and decides to just hide in a crate, while the workers just continue doing their job with no care what so ever.

Outside Shinji stands up on top of his robot and speaks with a more deeper accent. "Homura Akemi," he says, "Present our nations salute!"

Homura climbs to the top of the robot with Shinji and pulls out her middle finger to the rest, with the others doing the same. "Alright, this is the moment you've been waiting for," Shinji says, "Bravery will be rewarded, destinies will be revealed, and the honour of a new nation will be born! A nation for which I will declare... ANME!"

The group cheers with some firing up into the sky. "Wolverines!" Kamina says.

"**Symbolism**!" Tamama says.

Shinji then looks down towards L in the Ferrari. "Q! Send the signal to sound the charge!" he says.

L looks out of the window and looks up at Shinji. "Okay first of all it's L," he says, "Secondly the guy with the whistle is standing next to you! Why don't you tell him to send it yourself?"

Shinji laughs for a second. "L" he pounds the robots foot next to the car, "Just do it."

L rolls his eyes and signals Krillin to blow the whistle, which he does. "For all of ANME," Shinji says, "**Charge!**"

The others jump out of the robot and pursues. The robot Shinji is piloting pulls out a gun which he aims towards the warehouse. Charles looks outside and presse a button on a remote control which activates hidden mines in the field. This does nothing to slow them down though as they keep running and dodging the explosions. Charles upset by this, drags his cannon outside and presses another button on his controller. Out of nowhere a Jack-in-the-box clown pops out and manages to knock San away before it gets blown up by Shinji's robot shooting it. Conan turns around and notices San knocked out. "San," he rushes towards her, "No San! You were so young despite being probably older than me! Damn you Acme! Damn you all to hell!"

San however wakes up. "Um, I'm fine." she says.

Conan continues to cry however. "Oh god why San," he says, "You want me to tell you about DisneyLand?"

"Um no seriously," she says, "I'm fine."

"It's filled with candies on the trees," Conan says, "And you can just pick them out!"

"Look I don't know who you think you are," San says, "But I'm-"

Conan then hugs her. "Come into my masculine arms!" he says.

"You're an idiot!" San says.

Guts also encounters a Jack out of nowhere and slices through it. Shinji continues to shoot until he seems to run out of bullets. He pilots his robot to rush into the battlefield with everyone else. "Remember pain and guts is just telling you to try harder!" he says. He confronts a Jack that stretches towards the robots height, but he manages to punch it out of his way.

Charles readies his cannon and fires on them. One of them heads over to Tetsuo who uses his power to stop the canoon ball and flings it away. "Huh, I should have used this when we first got here." A chorus plays afterwords which sounds like they are saying 'duh!' which startles Tetsuo.

Edward and Alphonse encounter a Jack, but alphonse punches it out of the way as Edward jumps over its head and continues to run. "Let's hurry up and finish this!" he says.

Just behind everyone is Ussop running in full determination. "Yeah long live ANME!" a cannon ball however nearly hits him, "Okay I'm going."

Charles continues shooting his cannons and almost hits the Ferrari. "Hey L, I need you to drive for a second!" Mamoru then gets to the top of the car while L takes care of the drivers seat. Mamoru pulls out a rod and swings against a cannon ball back towards Charles direction.

It almost hits him and Charles decides to leave the cannon behind and run to the side of the factory. The group closes in on the front yard of the place, but then Shinji's robot bumps into an invisible wall. He tries to break it, but to no avail with the others having similar trouble. Vash even tries shooting at it. "It's not working," he says, "The bullets are just bouncing off!"

Shinji however gets a good idea. "Everyone get on the robot," he says, "Were going over it!"

They all do so and he runs up the wall. Despite being a very high wall, they manage to go over it. "Quickly through the rail-road!" Shinji says.

It's really a small toy train that happens to be left on the ground and the group jumps off the robot to crossover it, but Mamoru accidently trips over and sees the toy train rolling towards him. He screams in horror as it almost hits him before L picks him up. "It's just a toy train." L says. He rolls his eyes and they continue on with the invasion.

They then encounter more Jacks trying to block their way, but Ash and his Pikachu, which has a bomb on him, confronts them as the others move on. "This is it Pikachu," Ash says, "Atleast you're dying for a good cause."

Pikachu nods his head and says 'Pikachu' They hug each other and Ash prepares to throw him, but then Pikachu electricutes Ash and the Jacks around them. "Well, atleast we won't be needing that bomb idea," The bomb however goes off on the two. "Ow."

Charles finally appears before the group with a sword, but before the group can attack him, he confuses them before Charles appears besides them. "Hey!" Shinji says.

They go over to face him again, but then he disappears then reappears before some of the group member before punching them silly and disappearing again. They wonder where he is right now, but Shinji finds him on top of his robot and throws a punch, but misses. Charles reappears again, but before Mashiro in her Hollow mask. "Don't you dare get me angry," she says, "You wouldn't like me when I'm angry."

Charles doesn't seem to care much for her until she kneels down. "Mashiro **Super **Kick!" She as the name suggests kicks him up in the air.

"Woah," Kamina says, "She's like a Power Ranger!"

She then jumps into the air, over Charles and stretches her legs out. "Mashiro **Drop **Kick!" She dives onto him and pushes him down back to the ground.

"Hey, Hollow Mashiro is pretty awesome." Guts says.

After sending him back to the ground, the others surround Charles, looking afraid especially as Shinji's robot closes in on him. "Don't make us mindrape you." he says.

Charles however manages to escape from them into the building and Shinji looks to the others. "Follow him!"

They do so as they storm into the building and soon they confront him in his Chuckster D. Jonas disguise. Shinji then dramatically enters the building without his robot to confront him. "Alright Charles Acme," he says, "Hand over the warehoues and nobody gets hurt."

"I'm not Charles Acme," he says, "I'm Chuckster D. Jonas, his executive consultant."

"But it's so obviously you." Guts says.

"Yeah I get that alot," he says, "But the truth is that we are two totally different people."

"Okay, well where's Charles Acme?" Shinji says.

"Oh he's gone," he says, "Flew right out of his office window with his secretary."

"So, you mean we won?" San says.

"It looks that way yes." he says.

The group cheers loudly and Vash goes "The Acme warehouse has been conquered," Vash says, "A new reign of government is upon us!" He then laughs, while the workers still don't care.

"My friends this is indeed a great day," Shinji says, "We have given birth to a new nation! And there will be government, rules, and a new Prime Minister!"

"Why do we need a Prime Minister?" Conan says.

"Because I say so," Shinji says, "And I will be that Minister! Stoking will be my Cabinet member! And the rest we will figure out another time!"

Tamama jumps up. "Another time!" The others cheer along with him.

"And as my first order as your Prime Minister," Shinji says, "I shall build a table, a round table so that everyone could look at each other in the eye!"

"Well that's a good idea," Stocking says, "it's like everyone's equal."

"Yes and I shall be elevated above you on my Eva unit," Shinji says, "So I can look down on all of you and just see how equal we all are!"

The others cheer less enthusiastically except for Tamama who acts excitingly towards him. "Rest my people," Shinji says, "For we have given birth to one of the greatest nations ever known! We have given birth to ANME!" And thus they all cheer.

**To be continued...**


	3. Inglorious Glory

_Inglorius Laus_

A newsman stands just outside of the invisible force field around the new ANME warehouse. "Dateline California, here at the previously known Acme warehouse," he says, "Now is under control of Japanese Toons who call it ANME. Preparations are high as they aim to make a new nation. Hi I'm Richard Robswell, here at the newly placed and soon to be nation called ANME. Though it may not be easy to create a nation, ANME prides itself with some hard working individuals. And one of them besides me named Homura Akemi is getting us access into the warehouse. She is now an Ambassador of trade for ANME, miss Akemi what does your job entails?"

"Well I have some guns we could trade," she says, "I have some rifles, shotguns, and many others that countries would definately want."

"Aren't you a little too young to handle guns," he says, "How did you buy these anyways?"

"I think gun laws are different when talking of Toons." she says.

"Is it?" he says.

"..."

"Speaking of guns," Richards says, "Protection is not a big problem in ANME, as Secretary of Defense Vash the Stampede shows." He meets up with Vash later on.

"It's true that we are almost defenseless as a warehouse," Vash says, "But we have a good drill sergent who knows how to keep up the mens moral."

San demonstrates her drill sergent routine. "Stand up straight," she then punches Krillin, "Wear your hat right," she then punches Tamama, "Stop being a metal person," she then punches Alphonse which scares Edward, "Did you say something?"

"No, I'm definately afraid of you," Edward says.

San then punches him out. "It looks like a solid team you got there," Richard says, "Now there has been some reports that you are a little bit out of character."

Vash pulls a gun on the camera man. "Who said that!?" Vash then shoots the camera man.

After a small cut from that, the news people appear inside the actual warehouse. "However invasion will not be a problem," Richard says, "Thanks to Lead Immigration Supervisor, Ash Ketchem."

Ash is seen calling someone on a phone. "What do you mean you can't understand us sometimes." Ash says, "I think we speak good english, I mean it's never stated in this story if we speak Japanese or English, but how is it impossible for us to communicate? Hold on, let me transfer you to my second in command."

He then gives it to Pikachu who starts yelling at the caller in his Pokemon talk before hanging up and crossing his arms in frustration. "Every nation needs a treasurer though," Richard says, "And ANME is lucky to have it in the form of Guts. Now we heard that you have designed the flag for ANME, is that true?"

"It certainly is," Guts says, "And for a nation called ANME, I thought we would need a flag to represent our culture and heritage in the most respectful way possible. That's why I drew a man mixed with a horse fighting a giant cyborg raptor, while protecting a big breasted egyptian mummy. Because when they see that flag, they are going to remember it for a very long time."

"Indeed," Richard says, "I do see that you guys haven't put it up on a pole yet."

"Well this place doesn't have a pole and we didn't feel like putting one up," Guts says, "So we decided to have Alphonse go up on the roof and hold it up for certain periods of time."

They look up at the roof to see Alphonse doing that. "It looks like he's not happy about it," Richard says.

"No he isn't Richard," Guts says, "No he isn't."

"But a society must also protect its environment," Richards says, "And Mashiro Kuno plans to solve all that. Mashiro, how do you plan to save all the cute little bunnies?"

"Do you think I'm not prepared for something like that," Mashiro says, "Most people can't stand four seconds in their Hollow form. I can do it for fifteen hours. That's **fifteen **hours!"

"Okay..." Richards says, "and there are others looking out for the well being of ANME. Take Tetsuo, he is making sure that everyone is healthy and good acting as their surgeon general."

"While being a Surgeon General I made two amazing discoveries," Tetsuo says, "First, I learned that having spiky hair decreases the chance of being killed by a laser beam."

"How did you came to that solution?" Richards says.

"I have spiky hair and I'm not killed by laser beams, science proven," Tetsuo says, "We also learned that excercising and healthy eating does not increase your life span, so I got everyone smoking."

The camera man records some of the group members smoking, coughing, and some passing out. "Smoking you see increases the immunity system," Tetsuo says, "Especially for pregnent women and children."

"Are you sure about all that?" Richards says.

"Well of course I'm sure it says on the char-" Tetsuo then turns the chart right-side up, "Oh, well what do you know. That is just hilarious!"

"But not everyone in ANME is psychologically insane," Richards says, "Take for example Krillin the radio D.J."

"And the big wigs on the top that look down on us small people," Krillin says, "With repression, taxation, sexual repression, don't get me started on the sexual repression! Take a stand people! Oppose the big fucking people with the big fucking hats!"

"So krillin," Richards says, "What about the ANME government makes you mad?"

"Oh nothing really," Krillin says, "I am just doing this to boost morale by being the angry person the people agree with to feel better about themselves."

"Another person working for boosting morale is Kamina," Richards says, "Who aside from being a motivational speaker is also the head of the Research for Science and Technology."

"Well yeah when we started we didn't have much of a science department," Kamina says, "In fact, when we started, our space program was just a stomp rocket, but I'm sure we will be able to fly away to the moon one day."

"Say, don't you have that Doctor Tomoe guy in that bottle?" Richards says.

"Um, no what are you talking about?" Kamina says.

"Yeah that Doctor guy," Richards says, "He one day-"

"No!" Kamina grabs Richards by his shirt, "I mean yeah, I know that happened, but that was the past." Kamina dramatically looks to the sky.

"There are many others that work to keep the safety of this nation in hand," Richard says, "Like Conan Edogawa head of the secret police force of ANME... which isn't really secret now. Tell me Conan, what are you going to do to keep this nation safe?"

"Well it's all about surprising the enemy," Conan says, "For instance, we tested the disappearing ink on Mamuro. Isn't that right Mamuro?"

Richards looks at a wall before hearing a voice. "Yup." Mamuro says.

"But is surprising the enemy with stealth really going to help?" Richard says.

"Oh absolutely," Conan says, "In fact, I'm not really infront of you."

Richards looks behind himself to see Conan there. "Well now we know what goes on in the working fields of the warehouse," Richards says, "Now let's go inside the actual office for the center of this nations politics." Richards points to the office, only to accidently hit Mamuro. "Sorry."

They then appear inside the office. "This is a member of the cabinet named L," Richard says, "Tell me L, what do you do on a normal bases?"

"Well I go to Shinji to propose a plan," L says, "But then he slaps me and takes it as his own."

"Well does it pay alot?" Richard says.

"I don't even know how he intends to pay us," L says, "But it does hurt alot."

"But behind every great man is a woman," Richard says, "And presumably behind her another man, but in the case of Stockink Anarchy that is not so." Stocking sits on a couch smiling.

"Well he might be a maverick to say the least," Stocking says, "But no matter what he wants and what we might agree on I'll stand right next to him."

"On what issues do you disagree with," Richard says.

"Well like our foreign policy with the rest of California." Stocking says.

"You have foreign policy experience with California?" Richard says, "In what ways?"

Stockings smile starts to fade away. "Well if you look outside you can see California right out here," she says.

"And where do you guys get your news on current events?" Richard says, "Do you read the papers or-"

"Yeah I read them." Stocking says.

"Which ones?" Richard says.

"...Both of them." Stocking says.

"Well there is also talk that Shinji wants more regulations and you want less," Richard says, "In what way do you want less?"

"Well you know." Stocking says.

"No I don't." Richard says.

"Well once I get my answers," Stocking says, "I'll get right to you."

"And finally you have been described back then as a strong, edgy, independent female," Richard says, "But now everyone is saying that you are a cock-sucking, suck-up that is playing little goody two-shoes to get into the Prime Minister seat."

"There are alot of cruel people that don't mantain the same niceness like me," Stocking says, "Now ain't I nice?"

"Yeah you're pretty nice," Richard says.

"Then why would they say such a thing?" Stocking says.

"Propably the cock-sucking suck-up part that I mention." Richard says.

"I presume it's because I'm a girl," Stocking says, "And prejudice is still alive and well in this world."

"But Homura, San, and Mashiro are girls," Richard says.

"Yeah, and I'm the tooth fairy." Stocking says.

"And now for the moment you've all been waiting for," Richard says, "The leader of ANME itself Shinji Ikari!"

Shinji speaks in an attempted deep voice. "Greetings my subjects."

"Mr. Ikari what do you plan to do on expanding ANME?" Richard says.

"Well first we are going to try to break through that wall to take over Toontown," Shinji says, "And then California, then the U.S. and then the world."

"And how do you plan to accomplish this exactly?" Richard says.

"A good Prime Minister never tells," Shinji says, "I can give you hint though. It involves... using my Eva to kill."

"Indeed and what made you come to the idea of keeping the old owner Charles Acme in ANME?" Richard says.

"Oh he's not Charles," Shinji says, "He's Chuckster D. Jonas... I don't know, I'm going with it."

"Well thank you for taking time off of your hands to interview," richard says, "And one last thing. Do you plan to take over the world?"

"Naturally!" Shinji says.

"Would you say that you plan to take over the moon?" Richard says.

"Eventually!" Shinji says.

"Would you consider being bigger than the universe?"

"Of..." Richard smiles widely, "that question you can say yes."

Richards starts thinking for a second before finally decinding on his next question. "Mr. Ikari," he says, "Do you get alot of pussy with the plug-suit you wear when you control the Eva?"

"Of Course!" Shinji says as he turns his head to Richards.

"Thank you," Richard says, "This has Richard Robswell reporting from ANME."

The news program ends as it finally pans to the flag before closing off. In the warehouse, Guts is handling a bunch of papers before Shinji. "Our financial problems are really piling up," Guts says, "If we don't do something about this soon-"

"Don't worry about that Guts," Shinji says, "Let's just worry about breaking through the wall."

"We can't spend all our money just on breaking through the wall," Guts says, "If we don't fix any of these problems, we will be at a great disadvantage when we go invade. You said you were just spending on something to break down the wall, but it's costing us more than we thought. Are you buying other things or what?"

"That's none of your business," Shinji says, "Our priority is going through that wall. We got lots of stuff in this warehouse anyway so calm down."

L then walks up to the table. "Hey Shinji, I got an idea on how we can boost our profits," he says, "How about we open up some tourism material like T-shirts and stuff."

"No that's a terrible idea." Shinji says.

Guts leaves in frustration, but L counts down to three before Shinji speaks. "Wait, I have an idea!" Shinji says.

"What could that be?" L says.

"We should open up for tourism," Shinji says, "T-shirts, maps, think about it!"

"I already have." L says and then he leaves.

Tamama then approaches Shinji. "Hey Shinji," Tamama says, "How is breaking down the wall doing for you?"

"It's still in production or should I say destruction?" Tamama giggles loudly.

"I was also thinking of some ideas for the next episode of my Anime," Tamama says, "I think that-"

"Anime episodes?" Shinji says, "We don't do Anime episodes anymore."

"We don't?" Tamama says, "Then what do we do?"

"We expand our nation higher and higher!" Shinji says.

"How long are we going to do that?" Tamama says.

"Forever Tamama," Shinji says, "**Forever.**"

"Um, don't you sometimes get tired of speaking in that deep voice?" Tamama says.

"Of course not," Shinji says, "This voice represents leadership and-" He then changes into his normal voice. "a little bit."

Guts sits on a chair in another room when Ash walks in. "Hey Guts," Ash says, "What's up?"

"Oh, it's these stupid financial problems," Guts says, "He wants to spend more on breaking the wall down even though we are not as well armed. Even with that huge robot of his and our abilities combine could take the actual U.S. government, let alone a Toon one. It's like he's one of those leaders that just want to spread his belief without showing how it could be superior."

Chuckster then enters the room. "If you guys don't like his rule then why don't you become Prime Minister?" he says.

The two look at him with suspiscion. "Hey I'm just saying out loud," Chuckster says, "I bet you guys know what you're doing." He then leaves the room.

Meanwhile outside of the warehouse, Conan is training Edward, Mashiro, and Mamoru. "Alright men," Conan says, "you guys would make excellent soldiers, but now we must test you against the element of surprise." He then gets a pipe out and hits Mamoru. "Surprise!"

Conan then swings at him again before Mamoru dodges just in time. "You're learning," Conan says.

Vash and San then appears. "So Conan how is it going?" Vahs says.

"Pretty good," Conan says, "I was just teaching them the element of surprise."

"Have you punched them yet?" San says.

"After lunch," Conan says.

Then a piece of paper hits Conans leg. "Hey Conan," Vash says, "What's that on your leg?"

Conan picks it up. "It's a receipt," he says, "For twenty gallons of Dip?"

"Who signed for it?" San says.

"Shinji Ikari." Conan says.

As they read the receipt, Chuckster watches from a distance. "What's he doing with twenty gallons of Dip?"

"I don't know," Conan says, "But it can't be good."

"We have to tell somebody about this," Vash says.

Kamina then appears into the group. "You mean like Shinji?" he says.

The others say no.


	4. The End of the Beginning of the End

_Exordium of Terminus of Exordium_

At evening, Shinji is using his Eva Unit to punch the wall outside at the back of the warehouse. As he punches the wall, he sees that it is still standing, perfectly built, and mocking him. 'I came so far to this wall and still nothing,' he says, 'I can't give up though, because I promised not to run from this. The ANME empire shall prosper even if I must use every object till it **breaks **to get through.'

As Shinji still pilots the Eva to punch the wall, Stocking walks outside with a warm smile to the Eva. "Hey Prime Minister Ikari!" she says.

Shinji hears her and lowers the Eva's head so that he can get out. "How about some tea Mr. Prime Minister?"

Shinji smiles. "Why yes Stocking," he says, "I would love some."

"Good because I found a sink in the warehouse," she says, "And I want to test it out by making some." After she turns around, her disappear smiles and she sticks her tongue out in ickyness as she goes back inside.

Guts sees Stocking walking by to the sink and decides to go outside, but then Vash appears and stops him. "I suggest that you don't go outside to talk to him," he says.

"Why not?" Guts says, "I have to convince him to use our money wisely."

Vash covers Guts mouth. "What he is spending on could kill us all," Vash says, "You need to come with me to the basement right now. Everyone is there."

Guts decides to follow Vash as Stocking watches them do so. As they finally leave from her sight, she finishes making the tea before putting some rat poison into it. She walks back outside with a deceptive smile as Shinji notices her. "I got to say," Shinji says, "I'm lucky to have you in my cabinet. You are just so polite and cool-headed. I don't know why the press picks on you alot, you make a great politician and everyone knows that good people make good politicians. I mean just look at Carter."

Stocking hands him the cup. "Hears your tea Shinji," she says.

Shinji takes the cup. "Why thank you," he then smells the tea, "Is it me or does the tea smell funny?"

"I think it's just you," Stocking says, "Now drink your tea."

Shinji nods his head. "Hey does this tea have cream in it?"

"No," Stocking says, "Now drink your tea now."

"I don't know," Shinji says, "I would like some in this."

"You know cream just makes your penis smaller." Stocking says, "With all of the hormones and fat in it."

"But that just makes me want it even more," Shinji says, "Look I just want some cream in it. It just makes a big difference for me."

"**Alright fine!**" she says, "I'll get your damn cream!" She takes the tea and walks inside to the sink, all the while mumbling to herself. "Stupid little idiot. Making me make tea with stupid cream just to kill you." She then walks back outside with a fake looking smile and gives him the tea.

"Thank you again Stocking." Shinji says.

"**Drink it.**" Stocking says.

Shinji is about to drink before he realizes something. "Oh wait," he says, "That's right, I can't stand tea." He then pours the tea on the ground as Stocking looks at it with despair. "I think I'll just continue trying to break down the wall."

Stocking takes the cup and smiles. "Gotcha."

"You know I have never met a person like you," Shinji says, "I mean you are just so good at making a person feel so welcome, just lowering everyone's defenses. You know what I mean?" Shinji turns back to see Stocking holding up her sword and then stab it into the ground.

"I thought I saw a spider," she says, "I'm going to see if there are anymore." She walks back inside as Shinji continues into the Eva.

"She's so quirky." Shinji says.

Meanwhile in the basement, everyone except for Shinji, Stocking, and Tamama is there in a small room. "Well it's nice to be in a crowded room again," Tetsuo says, "I wonder if I can still not move my arms." He then tries to put his arm back which touches the others behind him. "Wow I can't!" he says, "Happy birthday to me."

Vash and Guts enters the room. "Okay what is this all about exactly?" Guts says.

"A whole lot of shit is happening Guts," Vash says, "Tell him Mashiro... Mashiro?"

They all look at Mashiro holding a cage of two rabbits. "Oh I'm sorry," she says, "I'm trying to teach the rabbits how to fight like I do. It's going to help them out in surviving out in the wilderness."

They all look at her with weird looks. "Okay then..." Vash says, "Um, Homura why don't you clue him in?"

Homura shows Guts the receipt. "We found this receipt with Shinj's signature," she says, "It says that it is for twenty gallons of Dip."

Guts takes the receipt. "So what," he says, "Do you honestly think that he actually has this?"

"Who knows what he will use it for?" Krillin says, "He could use it on all of us."

Edward than approaches Guts. "He's mad I tell you," he says, "Mad! **Mad! **Okay I'm done."

"Look, Shinji might be a little nutty," Guts says, "But he's not... **nuts.**"

"Look at me in the eyes," Homura says, "Then tell me he wouldn't do something stupid with twenty gallons of Dip."

They both stare at each other for afew seconds before Guts goes up to her to denounce her statement before backing up. "Okay you might have a point." Guts says, "But couldn't the receipt been replicated? In fact couldn't the whole thing have been replicated?"

The others look at each other with question. "How many of you guys have been listening to that Chuck guy recently?" Guts says.

The others kind of look off or whistle. "Yeah, kind of gets around doesn't he?" Guts says, "Those with brains have power over the brainless. Look, I'll talk with Shinji tomorrow morning about all this."

"What if he supects us goiung behind his back?" Krillin says.

"No worries," Guts says, "I'll put it delicately."

The next morning, Guts confronts Shinji over a table. "They all think you're nuts." Guts says.

"Those little cock-pricks!" Shinji says, "**Why?**"

"I think that Chuck guy is spreading lies about you," Guts says.

"I knew we shouldn't have kept him around," Shinji says, "Blame L, it was his idea! Now everyone thinks I'm insane."

"Don't feel so bad about it," Guts says, "People are always worried about changes."

"Yeah I guess you're right," Shinji says, "I'll gain their confidence soon enough."

"There's even a rumor that you are hiding twenty gallons of Dip." Guts says.

Shinji smiles and laughs. "Oh no Guts," he then reverts to a normal tone, "I actually have more than twenty now."

Guts looks at Shinji with fear. "What?"

"Yeah, the Eva is packed with 200 gallons now," Shinji says, "You see, I want Toontown to be all mine and if there is any resistince, I can use the Dip to erase them off from the face of the Earth. All I have to do is press a button on this detonator to blow the Eva up, all of it will spill out and wipe us out if there are any trouble-makers. You're not one of those people right?"

Guts looks to the left. "No, of course not," he says.

"Good, now if you'll excuse me," Shinji says, "I should go back to destroying that wall."

Guts barely sees a remote on one of his hands as he walks away.

That night, Guts and the others return to the basement. "Yeah you're right," Guts says, "He's nuts. We have to do something quick."

"Maybe we should rip his head out," Tetsuo says, "Then we should re-animate it, convince him that Stocking made out with his head before telling him that he acrually made out with Conan O' Briens balls, then laugh at his pain while he commits suicide and then re-animate the rest of his body and push it off a cliff into a field of spikes underwater, while sharks with laser beams on their backs fry and eat him whole!"

The others look at him with empty silence. "I was just getting into the spirit of the moment." Tetsuo says.

"You were just so quick on that though," Ash says.

"Obviously that plan won't work anyways," Krillin says, "What we need to do is convince him to step down by playing some really bad music."

"What kind of music?" Edward says.

"**Edward Bolton**" Krillin says.

The others shudder at the thought. "No one should be subjected to that kind of punishment." Guts says.

Myotismon then appears out of nowhere again. "How about we use my breepy bats to get him out?"

"No! We are not using that plan," Edward says, "Who keeps letting him in?"

"No one likes the plan about bats," Myotismon leaves the room sad, "**Why does no one like the plan about bats?**"

"Actually that doesn't sound bad," Mamoru says, "I kind of like it."

"Look if there is anybody that should deal with it, it's me," Guts says, "I'm the one that brought it, I'm the one that will end it. Trust me, by the end of the day, he won't be the leader of ANME anymore."

Tamama who is invisible, hears all of this and rushes to Shinji about to get out of the Eva. He rushes to him and pushes him back into the Eva while closing the robot up. "Don't go out there," Tamama says, "I heard the others talking about killing you and the different ways of doind so. Then Guts said that he will do it and so I ran, but then they found me, but then Superman came and killed them all. Afterwords, Superman took me to the Hall of Justice where I met Wonder Woman, Batman, and the other members of the Justice League!"

"Is that all true Tamama?" Shinji says.

"Well I got carried away with the Superman part," Tamama says, "But the first part is really true."

"It looks like Guts didn't take my plan lightly," Shinji says, "Well I want you to wait for the morning. I'll stay in here till then and once the morning comes, we will confront him and prepare a trial for him."

Tamama salutes and goes outside as he turns on his invisibility on again. Guts walks outside to see Shinji still inside the Eva and decides to wait for him to get out. As the hours go by, Guts starts to get sleepy and finally rests.

The next morning, Guts wakes up to the Eva unit empty and goes inside the warehouse to see if he's somewhere around. Suddenly Tamama jumps out of nowhere and shouts at Guts with unintelligible words. "What did you say?" Guts says, "Is that even english?"

Tamama however points a gun at Guts and makes him bant down over a table, all the while tying his hands together with some Toon-proof rope. "What is going on?" Guts says.

"**A triawl!**" Tamama says.

"What?" Guts says.

"A trial," Tamama says, "You're going to have a trial with Mr. Ikari!"

Shinji walks in smiling as Guts just bangs his head onto the table. "Oh god just shoot me," Guts says, Tamama then loads his gun on his back, "I didn't really mean it!"

"Hey everyone," Shinji says, "Come over here!"

The others come out of the basement and are all shock by Guts getting captured. "Were all of you guys involved in trying to kill me?" Shinji says.

"No they weren't," Guts says, "It was just me. You have to deal with only me."

Shinji turns to Guts. "Well you're charged for trying to kill me," he says, "All agree on sentencing him? I! All oppose?"

The others all say neigh. "Too bad I'm in charge with a robot," Shinji says, "Guilty! Guts do you have anything to say before I sentence you to your... sentence?"

"Yes I have somevery important things to say." Guts says.

"Be quick about it then," Shinji says, "I'm behind on knocking down that wall."

"When I helped create ANME, I dreamed of a new world order. An order of freedom and liberty, but now I see that it's been tainted by the **dumbass whore **that sits in front of me."

"You're out of order Guts!" Shinji says.

"You're out of order!" Guts points to the others, "They're out of order! This whole system is out of order!"

"**I am the system!**" Shinji says.

"I know you're the system," Guts says, "That's my point!"

Shinji bangs his fist on the table. "I have came along way from being that 'kid test pilot!'" he flips the table away, "All I'm saying is that you should know your place since this invasion wouldn't work if it weren't for the Eva!"

"Well do you want to know what I'm trying to say?" Guts says, "Because what I'm trying to get across is fuck you!"

"Fuck you!" Shinji says.

The two then starts throwing F-bombs at each other before Mamoru throws a rose at the two. "That's enough!" Mamoru says, "Think about the Teen rating on this Fanfic!"

There was a moment of silence after that. "Right," Shinji says, "I think it's time you die for going against my order."

"Actually," L says, "I have an idea-"

"Wait," Shinji says, "I have an idea!"

"Oh really," L says, "What is it?"

Shinji thinks for a moment. "The idea... is that..."

"Guts," L says.

"G-Guts," Shinji says, "To be sent to everlasting..."

"Being banished," L says.

"Being banished... for... for..."

"**Forever!**" L says.

"Forever," Shinji says, "You are to be banished forever!"

"Oh good," Stocking says, "I'll go pack his lunch."

Shinji and the others stand inside of the invisible wall at the front of the warehouse as they close it on Guts outside. "Let the shame be the shackles as you walk to the unknown," Shinji says, "Let the weight of this punishment crush you into a guilt like no other, as you journey away from our minds and hearts!"

"You guys know I have a cell phone for some reason," Guts says, "If you need something from me, just call." Guts then walks away.

"Let us not acknowledge our fallen comrade," Shinji says as the others behind him wave goodbye to Guts, "Never again shall we ever, see, hear, or talk of the name Guts... ever again!"

After the banishment, Shinji and the others go back inside, with Shinji going into Charles old office. "Banishment is such hard work," Shinji says, "But at least it's finally over-" Shinji then finds out that the office looks different. "My God," he says, "I recognise this area." The room has a square table and a fridge in the corner. He opens the fridge to find some snacks and rows of beer. "What happened to the office?" he says, "Where's my stuff? Where's the desk? What's going on?"

He then hears a voice from behind. "I thought you would like it this way, Shinji Ikari."

Shinji turns around to see a penguin looking at the wall before turning around to face him. "Pen-Pen?" Shinji says, "Is that you?"

"Yes," Pen-Pen says, "It is me, Pen-Pen. I worked with you on the Evangelion series back at Japan."

"What are you doing here in the states?" Shinji says, "What did you do with my office?"

"Hm, your office?" Pen-Pen says, "Don't you mean Charles' office? Speaking of which, I came to warn you about your situation. Return to Japan and leave the warehouse to its original owner or else it will all backfire."

"...No, I came this far," Shinji says, "Don't you get it? We are close to getting to Toontown and then the world."

"No you're not," Pen-Pen says, "That wall is far from being destroyed. You were destined to fail and it will be worse if you don't quit before it gets worse."

"I will not run away!" Shinji says, "I will be the greatest leader of all! The leader of ANME, just you wait and see!" Shinji then storms out of the office.

"You're a fool Shinji," Pen-Pen says, "You can't defy your fate, you can only avoid it! and you will fail Shinji Ikari. Just you wait."

That night at the basement, the others return to the basement. "How could this happen?" Ash says, "Guts is gone now. What do we do?"

"I suggest an attack," Conan says, "We must force him to resign by invading him when he's not in that Eva unit. I'll orchestrate-"

"Damn it Conan," Vash says, "He has twenty gallons of Dip in that Eva. He could use the detonator to blow it up and kill us all."

"I can do this Vash," Conan says, "I have seen Paton a hundred times!"

"No" Vash says.

"Please?" Conan says.

"No it's too risky," Vash says, "We need to distract him so that we can get the detonator and there is only one way we can do that."

They all look at Kamina holding the bottle. "No," Kamina says, "You're not suggesting..?"

"We could use him to infect your mech to make him look like a monster," L says, "Once we do, he can keep Shinji away from the Eva and we can get the detonator. He wouldn't suspect us if we disguise your mech as a Daimon."

"No you're crazy!" Kamina says, "You're all crazy!"

"Stop being such a poo-stabber and just do it." Tetsuo says.

"No one can control him though!" Kamina says.

"Let him out Kamina," Vash says, "Deep down you know that he is our only hope."

"No," Kamina says, "I know I can, but... we must forget the past when he did that before..."

Ash goes up to Kamina and punches him, which didn't really hurt him that much, creating a second of awkardness. "Anyways Kamina," Ash says, "You have to do this! If not for the team, then for us... the team!"

Kamina looks at the others as he slowly puts his hand over the bottles cap. "You do realize that once I let him out," he says, "There is no holding him back."

"Sometimes the best way to deal with a madman is to send in another one." Vash says.

"That sounds stupid!" Conan says.

"Exactly," Vash says, "A stupid plan for a stupid man."

"Are you high?" Vash says.

Kamina nods his head. "Alright, I'll let Doctor Tomoe out," He opens it and it starts pouring black smoke.

The smoke surrounds the room as light flashes around. Suddenly the smoke sucks back into the bottle revealing Doctor Tomoe standing in the middle of the room. He then turns to the others with his creepy glasses. "It's been a long time hasn't it?" He then laughs as he spreads his arms and looks above him.

**To be continued...**


	5. The fall of the Risen

_Cado of Orior oriri ortus_

__The next day, Ash and Conan sneak outside towards the Eva Unit and waits behind a dumpster. "This is rediculous," Conan says, "We have no strategy for this. Plus he's not a stable person to begin with. It's going to end badly."

"No, they are right," Ash says, "We have to fight madness with madness and he's the craziest we got." The two look at Doctor Tomoe implanting a seed on Kaminas robot. "Are you two ready?"

Kamina inside the robot nods his head as Doctor Tomoe enters inside of it while giggling. "I was born ready!" He laughs as Kamina begrudgingly moves the robot as it transforms into a giant squid monster. (Where's my scene!)

Shinji walks outside to go to the Eva, but then he notices the giant squid. "Huh, five chapters in and a giant squid finally appears," Shinji says, "I would assume that we would encounter this pastiche earlier."

The squid strikes, but it misses Shinji as he doges out of the way. "You misserable Cockasaurus," Shinji says, "Or... Vaginasaurus or... Are squids usually on the top or bottom?"

Inside the squid, Kamina snaps at Tomoe. "Watch the power Tomoe!" he says, "We are trying to keep him from the robot, not kill him."

"You're too soft Kamina," Tomoe says, "His reign of terror must end. For now a new reign of terror will begin... my reign of Terror!" He laughs as he takes over the controls.

Shinji collects his courage to walk up to the squid. "Okay you over-sized unfortunate implication. You want a piece of me? Well come and get it!"

The squid then takes one of the tentacles and slaps him away. Shinji recovers himself, "Ow!"

The squid then strikes again, but Shinji dodges again, causing the squid to hit the ground instead. However one of the other tentacles grabs him up into the air and starts slamming him towards the ground a few times. "Hey that hurts!" Shinji says, but the squid continues slamming him until he manages to wriggle out.

Both Ash and Conan watch as they sneak into the Eva Unit to look for the detonation. Shinji decides to run up to the squid and punches one part of its body. "Oh man," Shinji says, "I wish that was between your legs."

However, one of the tentacles manages punch Shinji between the legs as he covers it up while holding his breath not to scream. Then Tamama rushes outside and runs towards the squid. "Die die die die!" he says, "**Die die die die die!**" However he misses and runs into the wall.

The two stare at him for a second before the squid decides to strike some more. However Shinji finds a mallet on the ground and pushes a button on it that releases a boxing glove on a spring that hits the squid.

Meanwhile, Conan and Ash manages to find the detonator as Conan puts it in his pocket. They however stop to look at the ensuing battle, at least by Shinjis standards. For the squid it's basically the equivelant of trying to handle a slippery ice cube... who wants to take over the world to satisfy everyone. However the squid manages to capture Shinji and wrap him up, but then Shinji starts tickling it and makes it loose its grip. Inside the squid, Tomoe grabs a stethoscope, opens a door and throws it over the squids head onto Shinjis ears. "Wow what an impressive throwing arm!" Kamina says.

"That's not all!" Tomoe says. He then pushes one of the buttons that causes the squid to roar. This gets heard by Shinji wearing the tethoscope, which naturally hurts his ears immensly. "Oh my God!" Shinji says.

Then Stocking walks outside and sees the squid 'battling' Shinji. "Stocking, help me out here!" Shinji says, "This squid is out of control!"

"Oh right," Stocking says, "Where are my manners?" She then brings out her Katanna and starts slicing the tentacles, almost hitting Shinji in the process.

"Aim at the actual squid!" Shinji says.

"Oops. Let my try it again."

Then the octopus grabs Shinji and lifts him up front. Stocking slices towards the middle almost hitting Shinji again, but managing to cut off the tentacles holding him up. Shinji then goes up to Stocking. "No offense but..." He then punches her out, but then the squid grabs him again and throws him near the Eva Unit.

Shinji however lays on the floor knock-out cold. Inside the squid, Tomoe calls into a walkie-talkie. "Eagle 1! Eagle 1!" Tomoe says, "This is test monkey one and two. The whiny pup is down. I repeat, the whiny pup is down."

"Good work test monkeys," San says, "Test monkey 1, you must retrieve his body while Test monkey 2 hides the squid."

"Not so fast Eagle 1," Tomoe says, "I have a few requests before I do that."

"What do you mean?" San says.

"Well I want to be the ruler of ANME!" Tomoe says.

"Who the hell do you think you are!?" Kamina says, "That wasn't part of the deal!"

"I am altering the deal," Tomoe says, "Pray I don't alter it any futher! Oh, too late! You didn't pray hard enough!"

Shinji however starts to slowly wake up. 'I said to myself that I won't run away,' he says, 'And I mean it!' His eyes opens up wide as he rushes into the Eva.

Back inside the squid, the two men ham it up. "I wan't my own nation with a flag and everything," Tomoe says, "And an ice cream parlor. There's never an ice cream parlor when you need one!"

"No way!" Kamina says, "You are not getting your own nation!"

"Yes I am," Tomoe says, "I helped you out! I deserve one with the ice cream parlor. And it better have chocolate chip! God help you if you don't have chocolate chip! And I... And..."

Kamina then looks at the same direction Tomoe is looking and sees the Eva rising up. Lightning surrounds the Units hands as it punches the squid.

Inside the squid, Tomoe and Kamina are looking with horror. "How did he make those electric fields?" Tomoe says.

The Unit looks at its fists. "This you're seeing is only static electricity," Shinji says, "Surely a giant squid has not herd of it? It can enable the monorails from my hometown to travel from Tokyo to **Osaka**! And not just the person either. It also powers the mighty Evangelion that will be the last thing you see; the mighty robot that is elevated by electricity however, also levitates... **Me**!"

The squid looks at the Evangelion supposedly hovering over it, while the two inside it notices something. "He's just tippy-toeing," Kamina says. The squid looks at his feet doing so and promptly grabs it and yanks on it to trip him.

Shinji inside the Eva presses a button that charges up electricity into the Eva's hands and releases it towards the squid.

Inside the squid, Tomoe quickly presses a button that moves the tentacles to aim towards him and also blast lightning. "Enough of this!" Tomoe says, "We must finish this with **science**!"

"But he's also using science!" Kamina says.

"**Ours is sciencier**!" He grabs a lever and pushes it forward while screaming at the top of his lungs. Kamina also pushes on the lever and screams with him as the two giants inact in a lightning beam war.

Inside the Eva, Shinji screams in furious anger. (Is anyone sensing a pattern?) The lightning is however, starting to damage the Eva as it travels through and starts tearing apart inside, but Shinji still yells as he continues to face the squid in the beam war.

Inside the squid, Kamina pushes the lever and screams so much that his chest sprouts some pieces of hair, while the electricity travels inside the squid and humourosly gives Tomoe an afro. He notices it for a second before going back to pushing the lever.

Back inside the Eva, Shinji is starting to wear out, but then he decides to release his hold on the button and moves the Eva out of the lightining beam. This causes the squid to fall forwards onto a wall as the Eva leaps onto it and starts pummeling it.

Ash and Conan seeing this decides to intervine.

Back in the squid, "Surrender Mr. Ikari!" Tomoe says.

"He can't hear us!" Kamina says.

"Oh, well it was worth a try." Tomoe says.

Shinji inside the Eva smiles gleefully as he punches into the squid, but then he hears a voice. "Stop it Shinji!" Ash says.

Shinji looks outside to see Ash and Conan waving for attention. "Why should I stop this?" Shinji says.

"Because... it is a Japanese Toon like us!" Ash says.

"No, I think I still want to kill it." Shinji says.

The two inside of the squid panicks. "No, it can't end like this!" Tomoe says.

"Well maybe it's not an actual squi- oh!" Ash says, Shinji then turns his attention to Ash. "Well, maybe it is a fake?"

"What do you mean by that?" Shinji says.

"Nothing Shinji," Conan says, "You know how Ash is like. Heh heh, just continue killing the squid."

"I don't want to die!" Tomoe shakes Kamina back and forth roughly.

"No, I want to hear Ash out," Shinji says, "What's going on? Are you guys conspiring against me?"

"Um, uh no," Ash says, "Not at all!"

"Then I guess you wouldn't mind if I killed this thing?" Shinji punctures his fists into the squid.

"No... uh!" Ash says.

"Then what's going on!?" Shinji says.

"I have so much science to do!" Tomoe says.

"Nothing Shinji!" Conan says.

"Help me Messiah 90!" Tomoe says.

"You are conspiring against me, aren't you?" Shinji says, "Who else is in on it?"

"Help me any organized religious figure!" Tomoe says.

"You're just paranoid," Conan says, "We are your friends."

"Are you?" Shinji says, "**Are you**!?"

"Help me... **Optimus Prime**!" Tomoe says.

Then a guitar plays off in the air, following it are words of pure bad-assery!

_You got the Touch...!_

_You got the Power~!_

Outside of the blue, Optimus Prime drives in as a truck before transforming before everyones amazement, but Shinji in his anger slams his fists onto Optimus and breaks him into many pieces. This shocks everybody seeing it. "Well that's just sad," Tomoe says.

"You just **killed **Optimus Prime." Conan says.

"You all saw it!" Shinji says, "He came at me with a chainsaw!"

All the others run outside to see the comotion. "We heard something break!" San says.

"Did something break?!" Mamoru says.

They too see Optimus broken up and dead on the floor. "Holy smokes!" Tetsuo says, "You killed Optimus Prime?"

"I didn't mean to," Shinji says, "It was an accident!"

"My god," Homura says, "The greatest icon of both Japanese and American Toons is now dead!"

"Yeah," Shinji says, "I guess he is..."

All of them start to tear up as they look at their fallen hero. "This is a sad day for Alphonse Elric." he says.

"And me too-" Ed starts crying into Alphonses shoulders.

"At least you died as a noble bringer of peace," Vash says.

"And in fifteen hours..." Mashiro says.

Then Tamama wakes up. "So what did I mi-?" He looks at Optimus Prime dead, "Optimus Prime! **No**!"

"You should have grown spiky hair," Tetsuo says, "Wait how did he die?"

"Wait a minute," Shinji says, the others look at him, "Isn't Prime made out of the hopes and dreams of people everywhere? Maybe, just maybe, if we wish hard enough, we can bring him back to life."

"No Shinji, no," L says, "That's crazy talk."

"But do you dare try?" Shinji says, "Do you dare try!? Come on people, let's show what it truly means... to believe.

Everybody gathers in a circle around Optimus and starts holding hands. "We belive in Prime," Shinji says, "We believe in Prime."

The group then starts chanting how they believe in Optimus Prime over and over. "And now, everybody out there," Shinji says, "Everyone who cares about a treasured icon. We belive in Prime! We belive in Prime!"

Then lots of other Japanese Toons outside of ANME start chanting. "I believe in Prime!" Goku says.

"I believe in Prime!" Astro Boy says.

"We belive in Prime!" Luffy says.

"I belive in Prime," Lina Inverse says.

"I believe in Prime!" Alucard says.

"I belive in Prime," Hatsune Miku says.

"I believe..." Nicholas D. Wolfwood says, "Wait you want me to say what?"

"And now, all the people reading this fanfic," Shinji says, "Say it with me now! We believe in Prime! We believe in Prime!"

They chant for a few more seconds before they realize that nothing is happening. "Well that did nothing," Shinji says, "Toss him."

They then throw Optimus into a garbage can which barely fits in. "I told you it wouldn't work." L says.

"Yeah it didn't work because you're a dickweed." Shinji says.

Later that night, the other members go back to the basement as Vash punches Ed. "Damn it!" he says, "We have to think of something and fast!"

"I don't know," Homura says, "I think Doctor Tomoe might still work."

Tomoe brushes his new afro while Kamina looks at him. "I might keep this." Tomoe says.

Kamina rolls his eyes as he looks annoyed by him. Vash then punches Ed again as soon as he got up. "No, no, no!" he says, "No more Doctor Tomoe! We have to think of something else!"

"I think our last option before our... last option was Conan." L says.

"Yeah you might have a point," Vash looks at Conan wiping his glasses off with a cloth, "What do you say Conan? Why don't you try out that strategic mumbo jumbo."

Conan puts on his glasses and smiles. "Vash, Vash, Vash," Conan says, "I know we had our differences in the past."

"We have?" Vash says.

"Yes, I don't like you very much," Conan says, "But your OOC love of destruction mixed with **my **OOC love of planning destruction might serve us well."

"So you'll do it?" Vash says.

"It's my job to do it," Conan then grabs a soldier helmet out of nowhere and puts it on, "Alright gentlemen, here is how we are going to do it. We're gonna hit him during the day and we're going to hit him hard like crap through a ghost! Now then, since we have the detonator with us, we can hit him during the day and let him have it!"

"Have what?" Edward says.

"The greatest plan man has ever known!" Conan gets out some Yu-Gi-Oh cards and spreads them through out a table in the corner.

"We are going to use card games?" Krillin says.

"Yes, it's going to be our battle plan!" Conan says, "Now let's assume the Blue-Eyes White Dragon is Shinji and he is inside the house. Vash who is going to be represented by this Kuriboh card will attack-"

"Wait, you can't attack the White Dragon with a Kuriboh," Tetsuo says, "It has to have the higher points to attack."

"No they don't," Conan says,

"Yeah you see," Tetsuo points to the Kuribohs strength, "Those points are it's strength and defense."

"They are?" Conan says,

"Well I think so," Tetsuo says,

"I thought you needed that disk thing to play," Krillin says,

"Do you?" Conan says,

"I don't know," Krillin says,

"How do you play this game anyways?" Mamoru says.

Just then, Yugi appears in front of them. "I'm glad you ask," he says, "Well the object of the game is to deplete the other players set of points. In order to do this, you must attack the character directly. In order to protect your points, you must put some cards from your deck out on the field in either attack or defense mode. If the monster attacks another one with an attack point higher than the defense point then the remaining point depletes the players overall points. The loser reaches zero."

"Well that's good to know," Conan says, "Thnaks Yugi."

"Well thank you for the obligatory cameo." Yugi says.

"Ok, whose turn is it?" Tetsuo says.

"I think it was Krillins turn." Mamoru says.

"Let's duel!" Krillin says.

"Hey wait a minute!" Conan says, "What er we doing playing card games? We're planning a strategy!"

Everyone groans in unison. "But this game is so much more fun though." Mamoru says.

"We're planning a take-over!" Conan says,

They then hear a knock on the door and turn to it. San and Mamoru goes up to it and listens for a second. "Who is it?" Mamoru says in a girls voice,

"It's Tamama," he says, "I have something important for you guys."

"How do we know it won't get us into trouble?" Mamoru says.

"I wouldn't lie to you if I wasn't lying," Tamama says.

"Confusing enough," San says.

They open the door to reveal Tamama with Guts of all people behind him. The others are naturally shock by this as Tamama wears a sad face as they walk into the room.

"What's going on, bith-snitch?" Tetsuo says.

"I secretly brought Guts back in so that we can take down Shinji Ikari," Tamama says, "That is if you'll let me help you guys out."

"Yeah?" Krillin says, "And how do we know you're not trying to trick us?"

"Because... Because," Tamama starts breaking down, "Because Shinji killed Optimus Prime!" He then jumps into Sans arms and hugs her tightly.

"There... There," San says.

"Is that true, Guts?" Edward says, "Does he really want vengeance for Optimus Prime?"

Guts nods his head. "**I want his freaking head**!" Tamama says.

"Good, then we're all in the same page now." Edward says.

"While Shinji was away from his robot," Guts says, "We managed to drain all of the dip from it while jamming it so that he won't suspect it empty, as well as jam the actual self-destruct signal so that he won't explode it to cause normal damage to the warehouse."

"How were you able to do all of that?" Conan says.

"Like I said before," Guts says, "He kind of gets around."

"Good, now we just decided to let Conan plan the attack," Edward says, "And you guys just missed a great cameo from Yugi. We're just about ready to talk about how we are going to bring down the empire."

"Good, very **very **good," Tamama says.

"Good, everybody set?" Conan says, "Alright then, now we only have a few days to plan this out so let's get it right."

Thus, Conan for the next few hours showcases his plan through the cards as the others prepare for battle.

After all those days of planning, they are ready. "Alright men," Conan says, "Let's take him down!"

**To be continued...**


	6. All the really bad S happens

**Totus vere nocens shit venio**

Shinji in the Eva is punching the wall even harder and faster than before. Inside he clenches the controls and angers over the aparent indestructible wall. After a while he stops and sits back as he lets one of the arms barely hit the wall, but then he hears a crack. He looks at a small crack on the wall and smiles. 'Our conquset is at hands,' he says, 'Now to give the news to my comrades. Hope they aren't holding a grudge against me for killing Optimus Prime. Nah they obviously simmered down.'

He gets out of the Eva and walks inside the factory as he sings to himself gleefully "Three little maids from school are we. Pert as a school girl as can be. Filled to the brim with girlish glee~. Three little maids from school. Everything is a source of fu-." A cannon ball flies in front of him as it explodes near him. "What the Hell?!"

A mile away from him, Conan looks through his binocular with Vash holding a rocket launcher. "Excelent shot Vash," he says, "Except for the fact that you missed. Fire again!"

Vash does so as Shinji starts running away from the blasts. Conan smiles as the two have Shinji on the run. "Shinji, you magnificent bastard I read your **books!**" Conan says, "And they're sixteen years too long!"

Stocking enjoying a cup of pudding also sees Shinji scream and run past her as he gets chased by the blasts. "Oh that's a shame."

Shinji manges to get back outside so that he can get to the Eva, but San, Tetsuo, Krillin, and Homura stand before him. "Oh thank God you're here!" Shinji says, "Conan and Vash have gone insane with violence! Destroy them until they're nothing but rubel!"

They continue to stand in his way though as they stare at him with anger. "Didn't you hear me?" Shinji says, "Anihalate them!"

San points her spear at Shinji. "Do I have to start paying you so that I can cut your wages?" Shinji says,

Tetsuo then levitates him up and throws him back inside the warehouse towards Alphonse. Edward jumps over him and they start chasing Shinji. "Revolution!" Edward says.

Shinji then bumps into Ash and Pikachu. "Get him Pikachu!" Ash says.

Pikachu nods his head and Ash throws Pikachu at Shinji's face. Shinji struggles to get him off as Pikachu starts electrecuting him. "Go Pikachu!"

Conan watches Shinji struggle with pain and despair. "I love it." Conan says, "God help me I love it so."

Shinji however manages to get him off and kicks him away. "Pikachu!" Ash says as he runs towards him.

Shinji ignores him and walks away until he faces Mashiro in her Hollow mask. "Get out of the way Pip sque-!"

Mashiro does a flip kick which is a little more effective against him. She then grabs his kneck and throws him towards the ground. Shinji looks up to see her foot hitting his face a couple of times until Shinji dodges and gets back up. "So you like being a Hollow?"

"Oh yes I do!" Mashiro says.

"Well tell me how this feels." He then grabs her wrists and suddenly Mashiro can't do anything no matter what, "Female grab-hold kick!" Shinji then knees her in the gut and runs away as she agonizes over the pain.

He manages to get into the office before being blown up or found by the others. "Who would have thought being a Prime Minister would still be as hard as a monarch." He then bumps into L, Tamama, and Mamoru on the office desk. "L, after all the good ideas I came up for you-"

L then slams him towards the wall. "Just shut up."

Tamama then walks over to Shinji with a dissapointed face, "Et tu Tamama?" Shinji says,

"Sorry Shinji, but you killed one Transformer too many," Tamama says, "And I don't speak French."

"Oh you're such a twerp." Shinji says,

"You're a twerp!" Tamama says,

Shinji looks around as the others enter the office and surround him. "So you were all plotting against me," Shinji says, "You know I didn't think ANME would mean A No Moral Ending! At least for me. I am very disapointed in you."

"You have indeed been hanging with the wrong crowd Shinji," Guts says as he walks towards Shinji.

"Guts, how dare you return from your... banishment-dom?" Shinji says,

"That was the old order," Guts says, "This is the new order."

Shinji gulps loudly, "...New order?"

"Yes, One thats been coming to you for a long time," Guts says. He then notices Doctor Tomoe standing behind Kamina, "Wasn't he supposed to be in that jar?"

"Eh, he's preoccupied with his new afro." Kamina says,

Guts looks at Tomoe's afro with shock. "You're just jealous." Tomoe says,

"The age of ANME has come to an end Shinji," Edward says, "A new age lies before us."

"An age without **you**!" Tetsuo says.

Conan and Vash then walks into the office. "It's okay we found his body spread out over-" Conan says before finding Shinji, "Oh..."

"You had your fun running this warehouse Shinji," L says, "Well now it's our turn and our first rule of order, an old-fashioned Anime ass-kicking of our old Prime Minister. All in favor..?"

Everyone raises their hands and says "I"

"All oppose?" L says.

"Nay" Shinji says in a scared voice.

"Motion passes. Have fun everybody!" L says,

Before they could hit him though, "Wait! I have an idea!" Shinji says,

"Really? What is it?" L says,

Shinji stutters for a lilooks to the left and tries to think of an idea. "The idea... involves...um..."

"You" L says,

"Um me...um..." Shinji says,

"Getting" L says,

"Getting...I uh..." Shinji says,

"Your ass kicked!" L says,

"My ass kicked!" Shinji says, "Me getting my ass kicked! ...No wait-"

"Too late" L says,

Everyone is about to hit Shinji, but then a girl in a white dress and long blue tentacle like hair barges into the office. "What in cods name are you doing?" she says.

"Squid Girl!?" Everyone says in unison,

"What do you want?" San says,

"I wanted to take over the world!" Squid Girl says, "Now I want you guys to submit to me as your new-"

"Shut up!" Everyone says in unison as they punch her out of the office. They then look at Shinji and finally starts beating him up.

As Shinji continues to be beaten he then reflects on his dream. 'I didn't even get... to feel Stockings breasts... damn it.' He lies down on the floor with blood and bruises on him.

"It's over!" Krillin says, "The evil Shinji is defeated!"

Everyone cheers as Vash quickly goes downstairs to the workers that ignored the whole thing. "Revolution! A new dawn is upon us!" he says, "the uprising has begun!" He then leaves laughing mad as the workers just nod their heads not giving a damn.

As they cheer though, the detonator falls off of L's pocket and Shinji quickly grabs it and stands back up gleefully, but before he could press it, Stocking stabs his stomache from behind. The others notice as Shinji collapses on the ground in pain. Stocking smiles devilishly and claps slowly. "Well done everyone, well done," Stocking says, "Now seeing as I am part of his cabinet. It's only fitting that I should be the next ruler."

She then pulls her sword out of Shinji as he coughs up some blood and also takes the detonator from his hand. "You will now address me as Prime Minister Stocking Anarchy," she says,

"Wati a minute," Tetsuo says, "This whole cutesy naive thing is just an act?"

"Yup" Stocking says,

"You're not really that nice?" Mamoru says,

"Nope" she says,

"You're really not that stupid?" Ash says,

"Uh uh" she says, "But what I can tell you is this. That I am the new ruler of ANME and there are going to be some new rules around here." She then gives out a big noble womans laugh.

However Guts takes the detonator away, "Excuse me, but it was my insight that overthrew this government." Guts says, "So I think it should be I who should be the Prime Minister." He also laughs eviliy.

However then Conan takes the detonator away from him, "Bad news I'm afraid," Conan says, "since I was the one who orchastrated this operation, it's obviously I who should be Prime Minister." He also laughs evily.

Stocking then goes over to him and takes the detonator away. "No way," she says, "i didn't pull this innocent act to have yu as Minister."

"Oh no you don't" Conan says, "That detonator is mine!" He jumps to retrieve it, but Guts takes it away and then everyone else rushes to get the detonator.

As they argue and fight, the detonator jumps around the office and lands near Shinji who notices it. He slowly crawls to get it while nobody notices, but then the roof gets lifted off and everyone looks up to see Optimus Prime alive and well with the song "Touch" playing in the background. "Is that really Optimus?!" Mashiro says.

"That's right, on the third day I rise again," Optimus says, "In fullfilment of the awesomeness."

"Optimus!" Tamama says, "It's so good to see you!" He jumps up and down with glee.

"Hey wait a minute," Stocking says, "Why did it take you three days to come back? Why not right away?"

"I'm sorry, have you ever been a robot before?" Optimus says,

"Well yeah actually!" Stocking says,

"Have you ever died as one though?" Optimus says,

"Guess not." she says,

"Well I guess you don't have a frame of reference now do you?" he says.

Stocking looks sad as she fears disapointing Optimus. "That's okay," Optimus says, "Here, have the Grimlock model." He opens up his hand to reveal the figure on his finger.

Stocking takes it without hesitation, "Oh my God I love this figure!" she says,

"I know," Optimus says, "Listen, this task wasn't for any of you guys to take, now wasn't it? Aren't you happy with your Anime's being watched by many around the world? Aren't you glad that there are people who actually give a shit over what you guys do?"

Everyone nods their heads in agreement. "Then what do you say we give it back to Charles Acme? It was his property after all."

"You know he's right," Krillin says, "Let's give Charles his company back."

Everyone agrees happily as Vash rushes downstairs again to the workers, "Freedom, Wonderous freedom!" he says, "shine and bask in the glory of your new world!"

He leaves laughing gleefuly as one of the workers realizes what was going on. "Wait" the worker says,

As everyone congratulates each other for a new start away from ANME, Shinji finally grabs the detonator. "Oh no you don't!" shinji says, "Need I remind you that their are gallons of Dip in the Eva. One press on this button and the Eva will explode and melt us all!"

"Um, jokes on you moron," Guts says, "I drained the dip out of the Eva after I left. You push that thing and nothing will happen."

"I don't believe you," Shinji says, "I push this button and it will destroy that wall as the Dip melts us away! For this world will see that it will never get ANME! **For the honor and dignity of ANME!" **He pushes the button and waits silently for all of them to melt away.

The others look at him with confusion as nothing was happening and Shinji also realizes the same thing as he rushes out of the office to the Eva outside of the warehouse. It was still standing there motionless and intact. "But where is the explosion?" Shinji says, "I mean I got so close to breaking the wall, I mean look at the crack."

They look at the crack on the wall, but then it disappears. Shinji stands there speechless until Chuckster comes out with a jar of Disappearing ink. "You see Shinji I drew the crack on there last night and it appears once you started to try breaking the wall. Oh and that crack..." He grabs a can, drops it on the floor, and stomps on it.

Shinji slowly turns around towards the others waiting and smiling at his failure to explode the Eva. "Kaboom?" Shinji says,

The others than runs towards Shinji as he screams in terror. He was beaten up and tortured till the next day. Chuckster is waiting in the office when suddenly he hears a knock on the door and happily opens it to shinji looking injured and the others forcing him to talk to Chuckster. "Hello... um..." Shinji says, "Because we can't run a nati-" San then elbows him. "Because I can't run a nation," Shinji says, "We've decided to give the warehouse back to you. So you can have the Acme warehouse again."

"It was never mine to begin with," Chuckster says,

"Oh Christ," Shinji says, "Alright when you see 'Charles', you know when he shows up, can you tell him that the Acme warehouse belongs to him again?"

"I will relay the message," Chuckster says,

"Well you do that you twat," Shinji says, and then walks away with everyone, "Like I wanted this place anyways. I should have joined the video game tournament instead."

Squid Girl wakes up to see the others leaving and then looks at Chuckster who looks pissed off at her. She decides to follow the others as they walk out of the warehouse. Shinji looks back and sees Charles dressed up and waving goodbye at him. Shinji then continues to walk away pissed off at having nothing achieved. And so all are departed away. The shroud of the desert woes over the nation. Goodnight princes of mayhem, you warriors of virtue, the beauty of the world, the paragon of warriors. Now with the winter of their discontent, did they not learn that it was theirs to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageuos fortune? Did they not discovered that diamonds are forever, but tomorrow never dies? Did they not recall the old klingon proverb that revenge is a dish best served cold? Did they not learn as conquerors once before that all is fair in love and w- Wait, what is that? I-Is that a robot over my hea- Oh robot stomps on my body- ow! Please Stop-Ow! "No," Shinji says, ...Ow...

**Cast**

**Shinji Ikari - Nostalgia Critic**

**Stocking Anarchy - Nostalgia Chick**

**Conan Edogawa - Linkara**

**Guts - Cinema Snob**

**Kamina - Spoony One**

**L - Phelous**

**Tamama - Film Brain**

**Edward Elric - 8-bit mickey**

**Alphonse Elric - Handsome Tom**

**San - MarzGurl**

**Vash the Stampede - Angry Joe**

**Mamoru Chiba - Jew Wario**

**Mashiro Kuna - Lee**

**Tetsuo - Bennett the Sage**

**Benzaie - Ash Ketchem**

**Krillin - Paw Dugan**

**Homura Akemi - Lord Kat**

**Pen-Pen - Ma-Ti**

**Optimus Prime - Santa Christ**

**Charles Acme - Kevin Baugh**


End file.
